(Friends: apologies for this going out late today. I have the flu, and therefore take no responsibility for any mindless ramblings below. :) Merry Christmas to all of you. Glen).
Various personality traits comprise the beautiful and "fitly joined together" tapestry of the body of Christ (Ephesians 4:16). Some believers are open and gregarious. Some are quiet and reserved. Most are somewhere in between. All, however, are called to exhibit in their own way the kindness and graciousness of the Lord Jesus.
"The servant of the Lord must not strive; but be gentle unto all men, apt to teach, patient, in meekness instructing those that oppose themselves" (II Timothy 2:24-25).
"Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering; forbearing one another, and forgiving one another, if any man have a quarrel against any: even as Christ forgave you, so also do ye. And above all these things put on charity, which is the bond of perfectness" (Colossians 3:12-14).
Whatever our disposition, believers must exhibit a strong sense of approachability, of being "harmless as doves" (Matthew 10:16). This does not preclude honesty and forthrightness as we "speak the truth in love" (Ephesians 4:15). It does mean, however, that we should never be justifiably accused of presumption, arrogance, harshness, or any sense of a self righteousness that justifies ourselves even as we condemn others. Indeed, we are to act toward others as our Heavenly Father acts toward us (Matthew 5:48). Through Christ, we find Him approachable and "harmless" as He always acts in and for our benefit. Believer and unbeliever alike must sense the same in us, knowing that we will speak the truth, but in a graciousness and kindness that reflects that Love so gracious as to have borne the wounds of nails not for those who were His friends, but His foes...
"For if, when we were enemies, we were reconciled to God by the death of His Son, much more, being reconciled, we shall be saved by His life."